I don’t know if you can relate to this, but I have this terrible problem with actually doing things sometimes. For instance, I can stare at a bookshelf that I want to reorganize, stare at it daily, mind you, for months thinking about how this book needs to move here, move that book there, then put those three in order, over and over, I’ll rearrange it in my mind, before I finally realize that I keep thinking about it and I should just go fix the stupid bookshelf.
Same thing with my hand knit socks: I pile them up for washing and let them sit there, waiting. I think about how I want to wash them, that I have the little plastic bin and the soap I use right there, and how it only takes a few minutes, and then how I enjoy hanging them on the little clothes rack to dry, and then I can wear them again. But I do nothing, just think about it over and over. I’ll do that with hunger, too, thinking about finding something to eat for lunch again and again and then realizing it’s dinner time and I still haven’t bestirred myself to eat anything. It’s like I get into a loop where I want to do something but for some reason my gumption just doesn’t show up.
It’s worst when there’s a deadline involved, daily inching closer. Looming, in fact.
You know, like Federal taxes. Due April 15 by midnight.
I really need to get on that.